So today I got up at a reasonable time, made myself some tea and breakfast and then headed to my mums house.
I took her to the doctors because she has cellulitis and needs her legs dressed every other day. The appointment lasted an hour and then we popped to the shop to find some sandwiches for lunch.
We then headed to the hospital, it is nearly an hours drive, and I don’t know about most people but I find driving can be quite tiring.
We then got there and went to see my sister. She seems to have improved a bit because she is talking slightly more. They have recently put her on some anti psychotic medication and hopefully it is helping.
It is draining being around someone when they are ill though, I love her dearly and so seeing her being so unlike herself is hard. Trying to talk to someone when they can’t find the words to form a sentence is really difficult to watch.
I feel emotionally drained from putting on a positive face so she can’t see how worried I am about her.
I fear that she won’t be well enough to come to the wedding and as much as I’m excited to be marrying my best friend it will put a cloud over the day if she can’t make it.
Everytime I see her and she isn’t her normal self it really upsets me, I wonder what she must have gone through to put her in this situation; and what she must feel like now that she is living it.
It’s hard watching someone you love suffer, it’s hard watching anyone suffer at all.
I just want to fix her.
Then we had to leave her, leaving her is horrible, she wants to come home badly at the moment so when I got up to leave and gave her a hug she told me in my ear that she wants to come too.
Having to tell her no, and then leave without her, wasn’t nice.
I can’t wait until she is feeling better again.
Then came the drive home. It’s getting dark and there’s a lot of traffic. By the time I dropped my mum off I was really tired.
I’m meant to have netball tonight but I just feel too tired, maybe it would pick me up but I just don’t feel like I’m in the right frame of mind.
I messaged the leader to tell her I’m not coming but I will be back in the next few weeks.
I just can’t wait for my sister to start her recovery, the journey may be long but at some point you will reach your destination.