I work in a microbiology laboratory.
As bacteria don’t stop growing over the weekend we must be staffed 7 days a week.
The weekends are quieter as only certain jobs need to be done.
The lady that normally works weekends is on maternity leave and I am the maternity cover, this means I work Wednesdays to Sundays. Saturdays at busier than Sundays so someone comes in to help out on Saturday morning, but apart from that I spend my weekends alone.
It can be difficult being completely alone when you have a mind like mine. It is constantly thinking, worrying, never keeping quiet.
I sometimes struggle with spending so much time alone.
Sometimes I take a 5 minute break and ring my fiance to give myself some company.
For some people being alone is just what they need but for me it makes me vulnerable to the thoughts that can plague me.
After the weekends I worry that I forgot to do something or that I did something wrong. I don’t worry like that in the week because I am with people that can check to make sure that everything has been completed.
I love my job but sometimes I wish I didn’t have to work alone and that I always had company. Just to reassure me and distract me from my thoughts.
Life, for me, is easier with friends around me, and I consider all my colleagues to be friends. They know of my struggles and are all really supportive.
Today I am missing some company.